Order Up! A Brazilian, Boob Lift, and Xanax to go.

 

So these are a few snippets of things that have made me laugh.

Luckily they’re all about me.

Lucky for you I don’t mind laughing at myself.

But I’m not the only one laughing.   Oh no. There’s a whole 2nd grade class, possibly a few of their parents and teachers laughing too.

We were out to eat after my husband had just got back from a trip in Vegas.  He was talking about how the pawn shop there (some show on TV) was much smaller than he thought it would be and that he was surprised.

Before he could finish my older son said “yeah, like the time I walked in on mommy taking a shower.  I was surprised and now her “vachina” is famous in 2nd grade.”

My husband and I look at each other with respective mouths open.

“Um, What?!”

“You remember the time Daddy told me to tell you that dinner was almost ready and I walked in the bathroom and I saw your vachina?”

(I then recalled the incident a week prior and remembered when he walked in that he made some sound like “Whoa” or “Gasp” or something)

“Ok, yeah”

“Well, I went to school and told some kids at recess about seeing your vachina”

At this point, I’m sort of speechless so my husband takes over.

“And did they ask you about it?”

“Yeah”

“And what did you say?”

“I said it was like a big fur ball with a hole in it”

“How many kids did you tell?”

“Well, I only told 3 or 4 but I’m pretty sure they told others so now everyone knows about your vachina”

At this exact point the food server walks up.  His face?  Priceless.

Food server says “Um, I don’t know what I just walked into but I only heard the last part”

Husband “Well, if you were going to walk into any part, the last part was it.”

My husband and I were going out to do some gardening together.

He hardly ever helps but this year I’m playing catch up.

He says “If we’re going out to garden, don’t you think you should put on a bra?”

“I DO have a bra on”

“Oh”

Once upon a time I set up a blog and when asked for a name, I put mine in.

I didn’t realize this meant the blog name.  Whatever.

So I changed it.

No big deal…..until someone decides to take the name.

MY name.  The best part is that they use my name to run ads and spam people.

Awesome.

Today I decided to see if it was still around.

It is.