You might have been an asshole at a conference if….

1)You start to follow people on twitter from the business cards you collected and you’ve already been

 2)Your facebook blog page has shrunk over the weekend.

3)You try to DM a friend “Get me out of this conversation with @person” and instead you publicly tweet it.

4) Someone says they read your blog and you apologize to them.

5) You assume that the serving of cake pops is 10.

6) You treated the vendor areas like a shopping trip to Costco

7) You treated the vendor areas like a game of tackle football

8) You ripped apart a vendor display to get to the toilet wands.

9) You don’t reserve a large enough venue and people end up sitting on the floor eating lunch.

10) You were a hotel employee that assumed that every woman there was a blogger and not worth the customer service they deserved.

11) You thought I might fall for spamming the hell out of my community by offering me a “chance” to win something.

12) You never really gave people the attention they deserved and had a wandering eye for the “next big thing” around the corner.

13) You met tall, short, thin, fat, beautiful, or ugly people and judged or dismissed them instead of finding them the whole reason you were there.

88 thoughts on “You might have been an asshole at a conference if….

  1. I feel like I missed out on some free toilet brushes by skipping BlogHer… Damn! Think they’ll be available next year? Cuz then I’m totally going. Why bother going to conferences if not for the free crap and cupcakes?!?!

  2. Oh, Jen…this brings back some memories of last year. The grabbing of the crap that people feel "entitled to", the wandering eyes lookiing for someone "bigger". I had kinda forgotten about the assholes.
    My recent post Eighteen blinks

  3. I tried to ignore all of the assholes and just make it a point to meet and hang out with the awesomes instead! I’m glad I got to see you again, albeit briefly…and drunkenly. There’s a pic of us on my post. Check it out! Oh and for the record I got 1 cake pop and 0 toilet brushes. ;)

  4. I would like to second the statement about the hotel employees … I don' t think one of them was even close to nice to me.

    My favorite was when I opened a door (my friend suggested I go through) and a Russian woman involved with the breakfast service started screaming, "Oh my Gaad, Oh my Gaaad! NO! NO! NO! CLOSE DOOR NOW! OH MY GAAAD!"

    As opposed to, "I'm sorry ma'am, that room isn't open to guests." On the flip side, it makes a hilarious story I'll probably be writing later.
    My recent post You Realize We Can See What You’re Watching, Right?

    • I heard you kick ass. Sorry I missed meeting you. And yes, the employees were just some of the worst service I received. Except for housekeeping/ front desk which really kicked ass.

  5. I would like to add you are also an asshole if you stand by the doors of the hotel and approach innocent bloggers as they leave or enter with a "Can I ask you a question?" and then proceed to SPAM ATTACK me in the the midst of others where I have to really try to hold back my bitch face as I tell you "NO, I'm not interested in hosting your affiliate link. No, really. Please stop talking to me, I'm so hungry I might eat you."
    My recent post Blogher12 Photo Vomit

  6. I got to meet you and you were totally NOT an asshole and you made me smile. Also, I am now miffed that I missed out on a cake pop because some people are greedy beasts.

  7. Please tell me #3 did NOT really happen. Or any of the rest . But seriously on 3? In other news, thank you for the fabulous luncheon. Mostly for the giant hug I get from you every time I see you.

  8. I don't think I even saw a toilet wand display, but I did see cake pops! Even though I LOVE cake, I only took one, because I have manners. Also, I think I saw you at one point, but I was too nervous to say hello. I have issues.
    My recent post Best of BlogHer ’12

  9. I keep reading recap after recap of this year's BlogHer . . . right after I finally reasoned with myself that because I've been blogging for 8 years, it was about time I went. And now? I'm really questioning whether I want to risk what little sanity I have left, and actually go? *lol*

    In all honestly though, I think the worst comments have been in regards to the expo hall and the staff at the Hilton, and the fact that the venue just wasn't big enough for so many people. There were a lot of really heartfelt and beautiful posts from women like me, who are apprehensive about these conferences, but who went to BlogHer – their first time at a conference, and despite all the crap, ultimately they were glad they went.
    My recent post Out Darned Spot!

  10. I only took one cake pop and avoided the toilet wands like the plague. I prefer a magic wand to clean my entire house not just the throne. Now THAT I might have geared up football style for. Glad I got to meet you on the dance floor.
    My recent post Crazy for Daisies

    • Honestly, there is SO MUCH good but I wanted to get the asshole out of me before I wrote about that. I hope you read the good too. That matters.

  11. I worried about all the spamming by brands. I "get" that they want to publicity to their brand, but how do all those tweets that "Stop by Booth 35 to get a free…" help me? They don't. Many times I asked the brand reps what they were going to do with the fishbowl of biz cards. Save them? Add the data to their bloggger files? I suspect a few bands will toss the cards. sad, really. Because the only person who benefits from the fish bowl is the pperson whoi wins. I spent money on those cards and the brands SHOULD be using the card to connect with me.

  12. I was all set to go to BlogHer as a speaker and had to bow out due to some serious family issues and after reading this I feel less bad about it. I think I would have found it very difficult to ignore some of the behaviors listed here and from other bloggers I have spoken to.

    Also, is it true someone punched the Sparklecorn unicorn cake? WTF?

  13. I missed some of this and saw some of this and then saw some more, but nothing beats seeing my friends faces up close in person for a few days. Even if the memories are a little blurry.

  14. You were totally an asshole to me. I was trying to hand you a raffle for a free coupon for ten cents off a Chinese knockoff of a purse that you'd have to tweet and FB while checking in on foursquare and you just ignored me.

  15. I don't understand #2, but I don't have a Facebook blog page….

    I never experienced #10 but I don't remember interacting with hotel staff other than checkin and checkout.

    #12 – that! I actually can afford to just buy the products they were trying to make me sell my soul to get for free. That was really lame.

  16. These types of things make me nervous about conferences. I just want to meet all of the amazing bloggers that I have formed relationships with online and possibly connect with some brands, but really toilet wands.. That’s just crazy. People like that give bloggers a bad name. That is sad.

  17. Oh this is so spot on. This was my first Blogher and I loved meeting everyone (missed you somehow!) but the mobs and the going through an obstacle for a coupon for vitamins was a little much.

  18. Ha! Hilarious! I’m so glad I never went into the expo room(s).

    I am the asshole who took the whole pack of gum from the bathroom instead of just a piece though.

  19. I saw. Why there was only ONE chocolate cake pop left for me and my room mate. But I saw people grab plateloads of them like they were saving up for nuclear warfare.

    Happy I saw you in your "Sugarbear" hat, sad we didn't get to dance. People mentioned/rumored/gossiped that I looked so sad at BLogHer: it was because we didn't get to dance.

    People need to go to these conferences the way you do: expecting nothing but to have fun and be yourself.

    That's the way to do it.

    Next time: we need to make solid plans, not just pass each other here and there. I like you too much to keep on letting that happen. No more.

  20. This, THIS right here is why 1) I don't go to blog conferences of ANY kind and 2) I don't associate with LARGE groups of women, such as my husband's Army spouse's group. A few women can be a strong, awesome uplifting group of ladies that can make your day. A large group of women can be a mob that can turn ugly…I want no part of that.
    My recent post School Days

  21. WAIT. 10 cake pops isn't one serving? But they're so small! I'm pretty sure if you smashed them all together, it would equal one regular slice of cake. (Didn't go to Blogher, never been to Blogher, sounding more and more like I would not really *enjoy* Blogher. Except for the cake pops.)

  22. i don't think I was an asshole. At least not intentionally, but I missed seeing some fantastic people at HUGE ASS BlogHer this year. I am happy yet sad it is so large. Sorry I missed you, I wanted to meet you.

  23. This paints quite a picture. Glad you survived to tell the tale. Also, kind of hilarious. I hope there weren't too many #12's.

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