The $26 Post

I’m currently sitting at an indoor bounce house playground.  I tried to take my children to the zoo but you would have thought that it was the “museum of matching socks” by their reaction to it.  My older son then fandangled my younger son into wanting to come here.  They chose this for their last summer hurrah.  For $20, I get to sit here with a laptop with my iPod in my ears and write a post instead of walking through stinky animal houses.  My kids are geniuses. 


Wait, that means this post is costing me $20……whatever.  I’m like a stuck possum that just wanted to eat that peanut butter in the chipmunk trap.




I have a hard time with these sorts of places.  It really is the worst sort of environment for my ADD and sensory issues.  The lights, the noise, the bigger than life blow up coconuts….just walking in the door makes me want to take a knife to the pirate ship bouncy. 

Ahoy mates…. your bouncy is now flat, now go home.



The pirate boat happens to be my younger son’s favorite so maybe I should go after coconut island first.   It’s for the 3 and under crowd and they look like they could use a nap anyways. 


I’ve noticed that since I was last here they have added a “gift grab.”  This is great because all of our kids need more little plastic whistles in their lives.  As I look around I see that the subtitle of this place is “Home of the Dollar Sucker Uppers.”


My kids just ran by.  I said hi.  It’s the least I can do while I mostly ignore them.  Also, there are other parents near.  I’m going to use this as my “involved parent” moment. 


My kid is climbing some blow up dinosaur and leaping off its head.  He technically should not be in the coconut island right now since he’s 4 and it’s for 3 and under.  Someone should really tell him to stop that. Or take a knife to the island.**


Laptop battery just died.  Luckily for me that this place also has massage chairs that plug in.  Well.  One of them is plugged in.  The other is supporting this post.  They charge me $20, I take their power too.


Um. A guy just sat down next to me and is actually paying for a massage chair.  Really dude?   I should unplug his too.  Then I could watch him go to the counter and say “It stopped working, I want my $1 back.”  That would amuse me. 


Snack time.  Now this post is costing me $26


  Just noticed this sign by the chairs.  It doesn’t say anything about borrowing power and I’m not sure if typing is technically lounging.  Fine.  I don’t have anything else to say right now anyways. 


Who brought a Swiss army knife with them?

We should probably leave now.


** It’s empty so I’m not being a total jerk. 

13 thoughts on “The $26 Post

  1. Bounce houses are awesome because my kids come home thoroughly exhausted. They cost a fortune, though. And wearing out just 1 or 2 of the 3 kids tends to work against me. So I let them jump on the beds instead. WAY CHEAPER. Except when we have to wash the blood from the blankets after they crack their heads on the dresser corners. Still, soap is cheaper than $26. So. I win.

  2. haha! This is most wonderful. Seriously, this post makes me a) think of all the times my parents sat and watched us do something like jump in bounce houses/play on playgrounds, etc.{and WITHOUT a laptop or smartphone. I die} and b) gives me hope that I will survive being a parent. phew!

  3. Hee hee. Did you actually keep from tweeting all this while you were writing it? If so… impressive. If not, it could be your new blogging plan. String 20ish of your day's best tweets together and BAM…. blog post.

  4. We have a "Wee Play" near us that is $14 PER kid. Totally ridiculous – but on the 8th snowy day in a row, when Mommy is desperate to get out of the house, we sometimes go. There are no massage chairs there, though…

  5. Once my dad took me to Discovery Zone {remember that?!} and after 5 minutes came and found me and said "I will take you to Toys R US and like you have anything you want if we can leave right now." CHA CHING

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