Did I hear you right?

I’m sick.   And I’m sick enough to know that I needed to go to the Dr. today for an ear infection that started a few days ago.

I make the appointment with the nurse practitioner since that was the only way I was getting in today.

It’s fine.  I like her a lot.

As I’m waiting, the nurse to the nurse practitioner shows up to take the standard blood pressure, temp, pulse numbers for the chart.

She then asks “Do you still get periods?”

OUCH, nurse.

Did I catch the virus that makes me look 15 years older?

The Dr. arrived  asks how I am.  I tell her that I was fantastic and that I guess it’s my lucky day because I do in fact still get a period.

She asks what’s going on and then I confess “I put coconut oil in my ear and Pinterest made me do it”

She does the usual looking and poking and proceeds to diagnose a sinus infection with a “raging” ear infection.

As she writes some stuff down she asks “Do you need anything else?”

I say “I could use my garage cleaned out”

She says they can do that but it’s  going to have to be another appointment.

I pause.

Whaaa?

I know I’m not hearing that well so I say “another appointment?”

And then she sort of whispers while gesturing with her hands in a circular motion around her lady parts and says “You did say g  a  r a  g  e right?”

“Oh my god… YOU THOUGHT I WAS USING CODE WORDS FOR MY LADY GARAGE.”

And then she realizes I was serious about like, my real garage, not my lady garage.

And we laughed.

Awkwardly.