It also reminds me of what I don’t have.

There will be no heart felt conversations of my childhood past.

No lunch dates with shopping afterwards planned.

No bonding over motherhood.

No.

There won’t be any of that.

It’s not that this isn’t my reality for all of the year, it is.   I’ve grown to know that it’s ok.  It’s just part of my life and though it won’t change, I still have a great life to live.

It’s just that this time of year I’m more in tune to mothers and daughters picking out flowers together or maybe they’re out having lunch laughing and my heart longs for more.

Reality sets in, there just isn’t more for me.

This is it.

And that’s o.k.

I opened mine and found these adorable little Halloween figurines.

These are called “Furrybones”

My younger son got a toy bus and this t-shirt which is a play on Angry Birds

And finally he got my older son 2 t-shirts; he bought a bacon one and one with zombies which B wore to school today.

While the kids are at school, I head to the copy machine room in the school to finish some volunteer work.

I walk in and B’s classroom teacher is in there.

We exchange some casual dialog and she says “About that shirt B is wearing today”

My mind immediately races to “OH MY GOD HE DIDN’T WEAR THE BACON SHIRT DID HE?!”

I hear her mention “zombies” and sigh in relief.   I refocus as she says that he was going around saying

“Look at my inappropriate shirt”

Huh.

Then she mentioned the words that were on the zombie shirt.

Not having really looked at the shirt he wore today, my face looked like this:

I then did what any wife would do in that situation, I threw my husband under the bus explaining he bought it and he must have lost his eyesight on the space needle.

I’m fortunate that she’s a lovely lady and understood about husbands and we laughed a little all the while I wished I was butter in the microwave set on 100%.

Later, B gets out of school and he actually has on a different t-shirt (luckily he has an event after school today and the team all got t-shirts today for it) that he changed into.

I ask him to see the zombie shirt that is now in his backpack.

Dear 4th grade parents, I’m sorry that your child’s vocabulary now includes BITCHY and HORNY.

Well now.

This is not a shirt, had I been paying attention, that would have been purchased let alone actually worn to school.

But honestly?  At that moment I was just happy it wasn’t the Bacon shirt.

Worst website name ever.

It’s so predictable, it’s silly.My kids aren’t sick that much either.  My older son has only been on antibiotics once in 10 years.

A few weeks ago my younger son caught a wicked virus.  It was sort of uncharted territory for me.  I’m not used to a kid having a fever for 4 days.   His turned into a sinus/ear mess and soon enough it cycled through my husband and then finally me.  Braden missed it once again.

That kid.

Anyways, I took that virus to the water park over spring break and by the time I got back I was a full blown ear infection mess.  I hadn’t had an ear infection like that since I was a child, and at that time I had tubes put in my ears.

Then in a moment of pain and desperation, I put coconut oil in my ear.  I explained later to the nurse that Pinterest is very convincing and that I was also told to put olive oil in my ear as well but since I wasn’t trying to build a salad, I stayed with one oil.

(Disclaimer: I’m not a Dr. I don’t even play one on the internet unless you count googling all the medical conditions that I have or will have at some point so don’t be putting stuff in your ear.)

I leave the Dr. with my antibiotics, stock up on 50% off Easter candy while I’m at the pharmacist and go on my way.

A few days pass and I walk past this mirror in my kitchen.  The way the light is coming in shadows this bump on the front of my throat.

What. Is. That.

I touch it and when I do I realize that it’s my thyroid gland that is now swollen out of my collar bones.

That’s not normal and it’s totally ruining my neckline for a scoop neck dress.

I call the Dr and make an appointment for the next day.

Until then, I play Dr. google because who doesn’t do that?

I am not jumping to any conclusions about anything I’ve read but there are a lot of dots that sure add up for myself.

I found a picture of myself from last summer and sure enough, it was swollen there too.

How long have I had this?  I don’t know but I do know that it’s a common  issue for women and it is treatable.

Something I haven’t discussed before and unless you really stalk me, you wouldn’t know that about a year ago I realized I have a high sensitivity to gluten.  It turns out there is a link with gluten sensitivity and thyroid issues.

And that?  I did not know.

Now I have blood tests, food allergy tests, celiac panel  tests, and a thyroid ultrasound that need to be done to determine what exactly is going on and how to treat it.

I write this because Thyroid issues are often overlooked by women.  Many of the symptoms are that of just being a busy mom.

I know that it’s not something I even realized without seeing it stick out of my throat, and I have a family history of it.

So if you’re a woman between 30 and 50, have had children, please read the symptoms.

If you have many of them, don’t discount them with “I’m a mom, of course I have these things”  like I have been doing.

It may be more.

And as an added bonus?  Once I’m treated I’m totally going to drop those last 20 lbs that came out of  nowhere right?!

WHOO HOOO.

I make the appointment with the nurse practitioner since that was the only way I was getting in today.

It’s fine.  I like her a lot.

As I’m waiting, the nurse to the nurse practitioner shows up to take the standard blood pressure, temp, pulse numbers for the chart.

She then asks “Do you still get periods?”

OUCH, nurse.

Did I catch the virus that makes me look 15 years older?

The Dr. arrived  asks how I am.  I tell her that I was fantastic and that I guess it’s my lucky day because I do in fact still get a period.

She asks what’s going on and then I confess “I put coconut oil in my ear and Pinterest made me do it”

She does the usual looking and poking and proceeds to diagnose a sinus infection with a “raging” ear infection.

As she writes some stuff down she asks “Do you need anything else?”

I say “I could use my garage cleaned out”

She says they can do that but it’s  going to have to be another appointment.

I pause.

Whaaa?

I know I’m not hearing that well so I say “another appointment?”

And then she sort of whispers while gesturing with her hands in a circular motion around her lady parts and says “You did say g  a  r a  g  e right?”

“Oh my god… YOU THOUGHT I WAS USING CODE WORDS FOR MY LADY GARAGE.”

And then she realizes I was serious about like, my real garage, not my lady garage.

And we laughed.

Awkwardly.