Back by popular demand!
It’s time for the smart, clever, witty, people of the world to come up with words that I carve into tombstone form.
Your words sitting in my front yard to be seen by thousands. Or hundreds.
Come up with your best name, poem, or quote for an epitaph and leave it in the comment section.
I make the tombstone, so I’m the judge.
Rules: Be unique, no religion, satan or sexual stuff.
Submissions until October 6th.
2010 Winners Post (Smonkyou, SluiterNation, Guiltysquid)
2010 Winner: Smonkyou
2011 Winner Post (@moooooog35 , Woosel)
2011 Winner: @moooooog35
You can use this for inspiration if you need to.
Yes, it’s mine.
Well. Not MINE, a neighbor gave it to me. It was her mom’s.
Justina Wonmorsec
Don’t text and Fly.
with picture of witches broom instead of typical flowers or heart.
Our Girl Peg
She was sickly but sweet.
Unsteady on her feet.
Such a young age, though very brave.
Now she really has one foot in the grave.
*Inspired by your prosthetic leg, well, your neighbor’s mom’s prosthetic leg, but you know what I mean…
Gil Ted Intuette
“Just once won’t kill you.”
That’s what they said.
I bowed to peer pressure.
Now I am dead.
Here lies
Aday Late
A dollar short
on his medical bills.
Take 2 on #firstunderworldproblems, Ellen
Wanted a margarita during my bubble bath.
Should’ve made it before I got in the tub.
#FirstUnderworldProblems
The warning label said not to use the blender in the tub, but how else was I going to have a margarita during my bubble bath?
#FirstUnderworldProblems
Ellen
I don’t always burst forth from the grave, but when I do, it’s the Zombie Apocalypse.
Ellen
Here lies a kind woman
who helped many people
when money ran low. If
you needed a loan, you
could always go to
Helen Waite
Luke N. Myiis
Beloved Optometrist
Mrs. Lane E. Us
Died from an assortment
of uncategorized ailments.
Here lies Ilene, enough said.
Here lies Grandma Schrupp, she fell and did not get up.
Earl E. Byrd
A tapeworm caused
his untimely death.
Pete Onawier
His death was shocking.
(Apologies for the overload of entries. I entertained myself on a 20-plus hour drive from Wisconsin to Florida thinking about this contest. ;) )
Love it! Thanks for all the entries.
Rose A. Bote
Gently drowned in a stream
Stan Byer-Mann
Keep giving all the love you can
Les N. Toomie
Nobody listened when
he said he was sick.
Louis Lipps
His ship sank.
I would think Louis Lipps’ epitaph would reference his NFL career, but perhaps he will consider yours instead. ;-)
haha! I didn’t know about the NFL Steeler Louis! :D
Robyn D. Poore
Lifelong politician
Jay Walker
He never knew what hit him.
Here Lies Kat Laidy
Well, Most of Her Anyways
RIP
Ermagerhd Berks
Ahm Derhd!
Here lies A. Arm
She couldn’t afford to bury The Leg
I miss you. (that’s not the epitaph, but I suppose it could be) I am working on a $850M cell service upgrade project and it made me think of you. It made me think that about $100M is probably attributed just to you and your tweets. Could you kindly leave some G’s for the rest of the country? That should be one of the tombstones, here lies 4G, it wasn’t enough for Jen’s tweets. I am glad I took a moment to pop by, you never disappoint.
I may just have to make that tombstone. Just for you.
That would rock.
Rhee Ali T. Starr
Died of Overexposure
Busy Man
Ass-kicking Contest
Oops, my bad….that was meant to say N. Secure, not N. Denial. :)
My Headstone Idea:
Here Lies N. Denial
(Does this tombstone make me look fat??)
Here lies
Ma Legg
Mother to many, Partner to one.
Here lies
I. Hopalot
FYI, fake rubber legs
do NOT insulate you
from the 3rd rail.
Here lies Simba.
So much for that
“Circle of Life”
crap.
Doornail.
This should surprise no one.
“When Melissa left home that morning, she had the strangest feeling she forgot something.”
Wear a rubber leg, my friends said.
It’ll be fun, they said.
My friends are assholes.
Here lies Peg L. Egg
She only has one foot in the grave
Obi-Wan “Ben” Kenobi
BRB!
Anita Newdock
Here lies a promiscuous lady
Who went to a doctor so shady
that when she was dyin’
he was chatting online
And now she’s probably in Hades.
L.O. Elle
In this life he who laughs longest laughs last.
Here lies:
Good Grammar
Lived a long life,
but died as soon as
your kid got unlimited
texting.
Here lies
Facebook’s Timeline
Yeah. You wish.
U.R. Mother
You should have called more often.